Some observations on Gender/ Relationships

-What I have gathered is that the men here are very aggressive when interested in a woman. Partly because women here will say no even if they are interested, it says that she’s virtuous to say no first. (Makes it hard for us when we say no, but it means that we have to be very firm, almost rude, when stating that we are not interested)
-Domestic violence is a huge problem here. Open up the papers and there is some story of a boyfriend who murdered his girlfriend because she tried to leave him. It is not a hidden issue either. Some women believe that if her husband is not beating her then he doesn’t love her. (Common)
-Men are expected to have more than one woman (you’re not a man if you don’t) and
-When asked by their girlfriend about having another girlfriend, they ‘lie because they respect you’.
-Men and women are not really able to be friends like in the States, if you are seen with a man repeatedly it is because you are dating.
-Men are typically not allowed in the bedroom of a woman. Sitting on the bed is a huge no-no. (Side story: a fellow volunteer came over to visit me and he sat on my bed… my mama’s face was so funny. Oh cross cultural exchange)
-Accepting a drink from a man at a bar is an invitation for sex. (I do not plan to go into a single sheebean--bar)
-PDA is not common, it is something very private here. For example, a man will not hold his wife’s hand in public, but he can hold another man’s hand (for like 10 minutes) and it wouldn’t be a problem. Which leads me to:

Homosexuality:

Not an open topic at all. There is a push from some organizations to get condoms distributed to prisons, and several parlimenatry members, are against it and quoted as saying that if men were having sex with other men then they deserved to be infected with HIV.

So we have a long way to go for Gay Rights in Namibia